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Doing magick is not what magick is about. The goal of magick is to be a magician. - Lon Milo DuQuette, Homemade Magick


I have no more excuses. My boarders have moved out. I have no child to wake up or people to offend. Though I will have a new boarder in November, it is with the understanding that I will occasionally scream prayers to my alien gods in the middle of the night. He will just have to deal with it.

I have been longing for some time to start a new long-term magical operation, something to keep me in daily practice. My initiation into The Pact seemed a great way-marker to start my journey. Now, a few weeks later with a newly cleaned temple and a lack of prying eyes, it’s time to go.

My only problem now is what to do. I narrowed it down between two courses of study. One, Liber KKK (note to readers in the US, it has nothing to do with racist men in white sheets), a classic chaos magick track, oftentimes compared to the ceremonial magician’s search for a Holy Guardian Angel. Or two, to undertake the newest chaos magick system created by Peter J. Carroll – the Chaoballah. Presented in The EPoCh, the Chaoballah is a series of evocations and invocations touching on the elements, various divinities with planetary associations, and finally contacting Lovecraftian entities.

It was a tough decision, but recent examination of my magick has made the path clear.

I recently performed an operation with a group where we created a servitor to help keep us safe while traveling, and to help keep our vehicles in good repair. Two days after I actually placed the representation of the servitor in my car, it went kaput. My mechanic told me that going nearly 100,000 miles without a tune-up was a bad thing. All of the spark plugs were completely black. Because you have to nearly take the engine apart to replace the back two plugs, the tune-up cost me almost $400.

Essentially, my magick went FUBAR. I got exactly opposite of what I wanted.

I presented my results on the IOT Facebook page and received plentiful advice, much of it along the lines of, “You got what you asked for, your car is now repaired.”

I think this line of reasoning is partially bull shit. Is magick really just a monkey’s paw where it will find a way to screw you by twisting your intent? If that was true, why would anyone do magick? I will admit that I think part of the reason for my spectacular failure was a not so sub-conscious desire for a new car.

 When I meditated on my failure and where to go next with my magick (while using some chemognosis, something else I couldn’t do with my boarders around), I had my epiphany.

The majority of my magical failures have come from building a one-shot ritual for a specific purpose. It almost never works out. I don’t know if magick works poorly under a pass/fail criteria, or if these operations never produce the needed sustained gnosis.

My magical successes have almost all come while I was working my daily practice, but when I come across an obstacle I want to overcome or influence, I perform a short ritual gesture, such as projecting color magick, waving a wand, or just a statement of intent.

By working a daily practice I mean performing meditation and rituals on a daily basis, and those rituals having no set purpose other than to be doing magick, or for self-realization.

Chaos magicians often eschew illumination, denigrating the idea of doing magick for the purpose of magick, and prefer all operations to be results oriented. I have always suspected that a balance between the two is what is most desirable. Now I have my proof.

When I am performing regular ritual for the purpose of illumination – just being a magician – I have more magical “mojo” to produce results when I need them.

So I have chosen the Chaoballah. I believe it will give me what I want, a thorough examination of myself as a magical being. Because good things happen not to those who just do magick, but to those who are magicians.  


Hilma af Klint. Altarpiece, No. 1, Group X, The Dove, No. 3, Group IX, The Swan, No. 17, Group IX (top to bottom). 1913-1915.

Hilma af Klint (1862-1944) was a pioneer of art that turned away from visible reality. By 1906, she had developed an abstract imagery. This was several years before Wassily Kandinsky (1866-1944), Piet Mondrian (1872-1944) and Kazimir Malevich (1878-1935), who are still regarded as the pioneers of abstract 20th-century art. Hilma af Klint assumed that there was a spiritual dimension to life and aimed at visualizing contexts beyond what the eye can see. When painting, she believed that she was in contact with a higher consciousness that spoke and conveyed messages through her. Like many of her contemporaries, she was influenced by spiritual movements, especially spiritualism, theosophy and later anthroposophy. Through her paintings, she sought to understand and communicate the various dimensions of human existence. -Dr. M. Bunyan

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